Looking for housemate in Texas -- please signal-boost! [Public]

[ashbet]

BTW, if you happen to know anyone who is looking for shared housing in the Plano/Frisco area, please pass their info on to me! I would be MUCH happier (and willing to give something of a discount) to rent to someone recommended by a friend, rather than a stranger.

The room is approximately 19x19, shared bath (with a college student who is away most of the time), shared entrance/common areas, big kitchen, utilities and FIOS included.

Rent and exact location available on request (it's north Plano, next to Deerfield, close to Frisco. Reasonable walking distance/short car ride to Headquarters Drive. Convenient to grocery, pharmacy, restaurants.)

No pets, other than snakes/rodents/fish/similar -- I have 2 cats.

House would be shared with two women, myself and my adult daughter, and we have an occasional housemate (my daughter's father) who stays with us over the winter holidays, in the guest bedroom.

Happy to talk about more details if anyone is interested -- I'd much rather rent to someone within our social circles than some random person with no recommendations (and it would be nice to have a Goth-friendly, queer-friendly housemate.)

Comments

[mckavian.livejournal.com]

I thought I had someone for you...then I remembered he is allergic to cats.

Sorry.

[ashbet]

Oh, DAMN. Yeah, that wouldn't work :/

Unless it's a mild allergy and he doesn't mind antihistamines -- we could keep them out of his room, but it's an open-plan house and they roam pretty freely through the rest of it.

-- A <3

[staxxy.livejournal.com]

I actually know an artist who was looking for a place to move to in Texas, but she has at least one cat. She is, however, trust worthy. She does have her own disabilities. Do you want me to see if she is still looking? She is a gamer friend of mine.

[ashbet]

I'm really sorry -- I have "no pets" in the listing, but I just bolded it, bc I keep getting asked about people with pets.

Because Zuul is at about 25% kidney function and Bastian is so high-anxiety with other animals that he actually injured himself (ripped out a claw and required surgery) running away from a cat we were fostering, I regretfully cannot accept tenants with pets, much as I'd like to be flexible about it :(

*hugs*

-- A <3

[staxxy.livejournal.com]

it's all good. I checked in with her and she is in a good place for the next year. :)

[ashbet]

I'm glad to hear it <3

(BTW, sorry if that came across as snappy at all, Josh and I had some very extended and difficult conversations today.)

Several people had mentioned potential tenants who had cats, or a small dog, etc., so I wanted to be clear -- I *love* animals. but I need to take care of my beloved cats first, and they can't deal with other pets in the house.

-- A <3

[staxxy.livejournal.com]

no no, it makes perfect sense. But making a note of that in your "ad" (that you have one anxious kitty and another with some health issues, and adding stress to their lives is not okay, or words of that effect) might be a good plan.

and also, if you were snappy, i did not notice. My day, so far, has been rather full and had some rough patches of its own. No worries.

I really hope things with Josh have evened out as a result of hard talks.

[ashbet]

Honestly, they're perfectly easy to live with, if you're a human. It's just other animals that are a problem.

I don't think going into a ton of detail about their health problems or mine is going to be a great plan -- if I just go with "no pets," we can discuss WHY if we get to the interview stage.

(I don't want to make them sound super high-maintenance -- Bastian is very relaxed around guests!

I just didn't know whether I was being terse or not -- if not, good :)

Things with Josh . . . are. He feels strongly that . . . Christ, it's an entire post, and I can't do it right now. Basically, he thinks that I made choices 5 years ago that he was unhappy with but agreed to, and it caused our entire relationship to go wrong. Even though we were deliriously happy at the time. I don't even know.

I do agree with one thing -- he says that what I need, at this point in my life, is someone who is going to put me first.

(Not hierarchical, not monogamous -- but primary, to some degree. Especially if living together and financially intertwined -- the choices my partner makes, under those circumstances, affect me *directly* -- and that means that I want more input into those decisions than Josh is willing to give.)

And it makes me really sad -- because he had promised to be my "life partner," and that I was his mate, and his beloved. And I thought that meant, from his words and actions, that what we had *was* something that was both emotionally special, and carried some extra weight when it came to making decisions that affected both of us.

I was wrong.

He wanted non-hierarchical poly -- but to an extent that meant that he wanted to be more of a free agent than I'm capable of dealing with, since I have to worry about things like "If I'm left alone in the house for 5 days, how will I get groceries, because I don't have a wheelchair lift on the car?"

I fucking hate being crippled, and I hate that -- while he says that my disability isn't the *reason* for him leaving me, it certainly led to me needing more than he had or was willing to give. And it led to cohabitation, which I had been trying to avoid, because I *know* this disease is difficult to live with.

I don't think it's hierarchical poly if you say "I am totally okay with you being with other people and with you becoming serious about them and considering them co-primaries." But I did think that "life partner," and all the entanglements related to that, had an additional meaning, when decisions he made affected the household finances or my health and safety.

*sigh*

It doesn't matter. It's over. But it means that part of what I treasured, part of what I thought I had, only existed inside my own heart.

-- A </3

[staxxy.livejournal.com]

That is a terrible and hard place to be. *hugs*